Look, it's me! In a picture of myself that I don't hate! And I look like I'm wearing lipstick. Yeah, I don't get that, either.
In other news, Matt comes home in a few days. HALLELUJAH!
In case you hadn't noticed, I totally suck at updating anything these days. Sorry. I plan to fix that, somehow. It's just that my life is so much more (happily) boring now that I don't work at the Diner anymore. It's like heaven. I don't think there's a scale that can measure how much stress I don't have in my life now. I have time for things like cooking (which I actually enjoy... you should come over for dinner some time), cleaning (which is nice because I don't feel like a total slob now), reading, and doing silly little crafty things. In other words, I'm happy. And who wants to read about that every day?
I am officially considering switching birth control. Yes, again. Why, you ask?
THIS ESTROGEN SHIT IS MAKING ME FUCKING CRAZY.
I'm not even kidding. I never used to be this insecure. I was certainly never this miserable whenever I got my period. I'm beginning to think (don't be too shocked here) that the boobs might (MIGHT) not be worth it. And I fucking love my boobs. Seriously. They're fantastic. I check myself out every chance I get. When I'm not being completely down on myself, that is. Before this crazy-ass estrogen-based birth control, I thought I was pretty hot. Now, I can completely convince myself that there is no reason any guy would ever look at me because I'm ugly and I'm gaining weight and I have ugly teeth and a horrible complexion. Now that the period-induced estrogen is somewhat waning, I can tell you that none of these things are true. (Just so you know, I always love the boobs, regardless of the state of my estrogen-induced insanity.)
So my question is, are the boobs really worth it? I mean, I really really like them. They make me happy. Isn't there some kind of possibility that I can just NOT be crazy? Every time I get a little less estrogen in my system, I tell myself that there's no way that I'll let myself get like this again. I'm not even one full day out of it, and I can convince myself that everything will be fine next time. There's a little voice, however, that is telling me that it might not be. I never really listened to that voice before, but now there's another reason to not give in to the craziness. Poor Matt has to deal with it now, too, and that's just not fair to him. But we have to ask ourselves, does he not deserve the boobs? Are the boobs not worth the craziness? Can we not just keep the boobs a while longer?